Ridiculously large purses are known to inspire wild theories about their contents in men. They wonder what sex toys you decided to carry around and look at you like a kinky desirable sexual being just because of the presence of your huge bag.

Have you ever wanted to inspire awe and wonder at the possible contents of your ridiculously large purse, but didn’t know how to pull it off? Here are some tips for you!

First go through all your pockets and collect those used tissues, expired granola bars and linty candy. This will serve as your base for a fully packed gigantic purse.

Now go through your makeup. You have an absolutely useless lip-gloss collection? Good for you! Lip-glosses build the second layer in your purse.

The third layer is the first one made of usable content. If you like to wear unrealistically high heels you should pack some ballerinas. Also you probably always dress way too cold because you want to look humpable – so pack a light jacket for later that night when partner(s) for copulating have been decided on.

Pack a book. This adds volume and it looks like you can read. You can also impress people with a specific author or title (more advanced technique).

The last layer is reserved for things you will frequently use, like your wallet or phone. Thanks to the bottom-layers they will always be at hand and you can avoid groping around in the chaos of your pitch black bag.

Have fun getting laid with the help of my tried and tested tips!